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Wednesday 17 December 2014

Emancipation: An Explanation

It’s been a long while since our last post.

The reason(s) behind it are not so easy to put into words, but here goes…

I know someone who is a middle child of five siblings. Everyone seems to understand that when it comes to placement in a family that’s the worst place to be. Some think that the middle child simply gets forgotten for no reason; others believe that the eldest is the leader and the youngest is the baby, but the middle child has no real place.

How much of this is true? Possibly none of it and possibly all of it; but in the case of this person I know she grew up with little love from her parents, while all the time being resented by her siblings.

Each time she meets with her siblings all she gets from them is derision and scorn. There has not been a single occasion where her siblings have sung her praises or at the very least, have something nice to say to, or about her.

Yet for the love of her mother she puts up with it… up until a point.

Yes, she reached the point where she feels little more than garbage in the eyes of her siblings. A punching bag, a ball to be kicked around. She exists to do their bidding, no questions asked.

They kept her mother around when they felt she was useful; later when this was no longer the case and far from being useful her mother became a burden they looked for ways and means to ‘unload’ her.

When her mother raised all her siblings’ children (her nieces and nephews) she was kept; but now when she is no longer able to do so they want to push her away, and let it be someone else’s burden and responsibility?

That’s when she snapped, this person I know, and said enough is enough.

So when this person I know refuses to play ball with her siblings the gloves came off. Calls even came from a long distance away deriding her; reminding her of her duties and responsibilities while at the same time they began shirking away from theirs.

Then things got nasty; her siblings resorted to employing strong arm tactics. Using an uncle to call and rant at her. This was when she said, maybe it’s time she reconsiders her part in this ‘family’. So with a heavy heart and the support of those around her who truly love her she parted ways with her family. She sought emancipation.

Yes, it was cruel and unusual punishment but she never sought, did not expect and never got help raising Brendan from her mother. Yes, this person I know is the person I love with all of my heart and every fiber of my being. She is the mother of my child and as long as I live and breathe I will defend her decision to the end.

Cutting ties was easier said than done, not a mere changing of telephone numbers. They were determined to give her their collective ‘pieces of minds’. They stalked her and found ways and means to get at her, one way or another. This was when our blog posts stopped.

So dearest KJ, KS and KMF, if you do stumble upon this post please understand that despite your hollow assertions that you love your sister she never once felt nor received it. If you have not once uttered the words “I love you” then you have not once loved her. She has been bullied and pushed around for the last time, and if you so choose come and have words with me instead.

Her birthday is coming up in two weeks’ time. In honour of her spirit, gaiety and cheerfulness in the face of adversity I will restart our photo-travel-blog.

Wish us luck.

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